Going Around In Circles.

It's very simple. I like him but I don't know how to tell him that I like him. This feels like adolescent behavior. Nothing is clearly stated how it usually happens with adult interactions. He talks to me about women that he's interested in and then turns around and sleeps with me. How is the line between friendship and something else not supposed to be blurry?

I told him once: I can be friends or a casual booty call. I can't do both. Then I thought it wouldn't matter. But it does. So I put my foot in my mouth and it all goes back to being the same. To me being his buddy that he sometimes fucks.

I don't want a boyfriend. I don't want to see him every single day. I do want him to care about me and to not talk to me about other women and to want to see me randomly and not just for sex.

So I guess this is what a crush feels like... Or is it something else? I'll find myself some distractions, those usually help.

I'm just sick of it all...

*Currently listening to Melt My Heart To Stone by Adele, on repeat - This song suits me right now*