I think it's too soon to say I'm over him. That's definitely not the case. And perhaps it would be premature to state that the memories of him wont make me sad ever again... They probably will. After-all, he made me feel rejected, insecure, used, sometimes even ridiculous... But now I can also look back and see that there was a lot of good too... There were times when he was so tender it would melt my heart, times when he was so passionate it would light me up on fire, times when he was so involved I thought it would all work out...
The beauty of it all is that it was what it had to be and I'm finally letting go. I feel good. I feel good with myself. I feel good about the future.
Today, I have smiled all day. I have the urgent desire to do things for myself, things that will make me happy, to once again be involved and star in this extraordinary film, my life.
I was lost and now I'm found. It's not too soon to say that. It's not too soon to feel happiness again. And this happiness has not stemmed from him, it's all mine, a little ray of sunshine beaming strongly, working its way to fill me up once more... I can feel the void in me slowly disapearing, it's being filled with self-love, I can feel myself coming into place again... I know it's going to take some time for me to heal completely but I'm happy, I can truly say I'm happy. It IS going to be okay... For a while there I didn't believe it...
My heart is not dead. I am alive! ♥
The Irony...
*Currently listening to Dead Hearts by Stars*
im telling you one day you are like fuck this...and you do not look back..well sometimes only to not make the same mistakes again...but i know the feeling. love you chimi
ReplyDeleteYes chiquita don't look back! Pa' delante.
ReplyDeleteCall me!